Attempting to talk sports, Festivities, Out of the Ordinary, Travel

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

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I’m going to do my best in telling this Vegas story to you. Those of you who read my post back in May Signed, Sealed, Delivered know that one of the many places I wanted to visit was Las Vegas. I knew what to expect, but nothing at the same time. It really is one big party all day, everyday.

My first experience playing Black Jack, I won $40. If you want to look at it that way. I put down $60 and walked away with $40. But at least I walked away with something. Now let me try to describe these Poker and Black Jack dealers to you. For the most part, they look absolutely miserable. Seriously. If anyone in Vegas is not having a grand old-time, it’s the table dealers. Of all the tables Sam and I sat down at, there was probably one guy who chuckled his way through every card, taking our chips with him. They look bored, agitated by the drunks and egotistical people and I’m sure their only real pleasure is seeing those egotistical gamblers lose. One guy sat down next to us and flicked his hand around when he wanted to hold like he was swatting away a fly. It made me want to gag.

200-69 I’m like, “Whoa dude. We’re at a $10 table…let’s calm down shall we?”

He also used a cup holder as an ashtray. So we already know what kind of person he is.

The heat in Vegas is enough for me to say I could only handle staying there for two days max. 110 degrees during the day with no chance of cloudy shades, and 98 degrees at night with no chance of seeing Nick Lachey. At least everywhere you go has air conditioning because if not….Bye Vegas, I look forward to never seeing you again.

Our first official day in Vegas was on Saturday and we spent a few hours by the pool. Even with half of the visitors being families, it still felt like my Spring Break in Panama City Beach, FL in March of 2013. Loud, obnoxious techno music, and women and men in skimpy bikinis when they probably shouldn’t be in skimpy bikinis.

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This would have been a great picture if it didn’t look like Sam was sticking his $50 straw up his nose.

That giant pyramid in the back was our hotel! The Luxor, which was pretty neat.

Now onto the best part. Earlier that morning we decided to place some bets on a few baseball games going on that day. I’ve always liked baseball but I can’t follow it as well as I can basketball. I have a basic knowledge of baseball and know what teams are good, decent, and horrible. Therefore, I went with a three game parlay and chose the Giants, Cardinals, and Angels. I only put down $20 while Sam put down $40. I figured he had a better chance of winning than me.

So that afternoon, we attempted some more Black Jack, and we did absolutely horrible. Sam lost $200 in a matter of 20 minutes. I was doing okay until I hit a hot table and was up $185. We had a cut off of $200 and I was like, “Hey, we should probably stop here.” Sam got a little greedy and told me to keep going and then I lost it all! It will be something I can make fun of him for for at least a few years. So we were down in the dumps and decided to watch the baseball games. Sam lost. However, I was doing beautifully. The Giants won, the Cardinals were up 6-1 but the Angels were hurting slightly. They were only up 2-1 and I needed them to get at least one more run. Our eyes were glued to my phone until they finally won and the Cardinals won 8-1. Which means I saved our asses and won $300. Out of all the things I could have won in Vegas, and it was on baseball. I’m just going to stick with sports bets the next time I come.

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This is me rolling in the dough.

So I won back all of the money we had lost and it was as if we were never in Vegas. If only I had put down $100 and I would have won $1500. Damn.

Later that night we went to an awesome Vegas show called Fantasy that reminded me of a burlesque show and they had a comedian.

This is me with the comedian:

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He did an incredible James Brown and Michael Jackson impression. I can’t even describe it because it was so good.

Basically, Vegas is one big “Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda”, at least that’s how Sam sees it. If should have put down $100 on that baseball parlay. I should have stopped at $185 at that Black Jack table. Sam should have chosen the Yankees instead of the Astros (that’s what I would have done).

Always save as much money as you can before heading to Vegas so that it doesn’t sting as bad when you take a look at your bank account. As for me…it was as if I never went, thank god.

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8 thoughts on “Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

  1. I love the photo with the straw up Sam’s nose. Of course you ruined it by saying it only LOOKED like the straw was up his nose. Why ruin a perfectly good photo with the truth?

    I’ve been to Vegas twice in my life and I can say I’m pretty much good; I don’t really feel the need to go again. The second time we went to Vegas a friend of mine who lives there was able to get us free tickets to one of those big flashy shows with topless girl dancers in big costumes. Like the stereotypical old-time Vegas show. Our free seats were up in the booth area where the show operations took place. At the end of the show all the topless girls were lifted up on cables and they ended up being right in front of us at chest level. It was boobies as far as the eye could see. It struck me as funny for some reason. OK, that’s all I have to say about Vegas. Glad you won some of your money back! It seems like that rarely happens.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah I could maybe handle 2 days max in Vegas and I’m in no rush to go back! That’s a pretty awkward angle to see a bunch of boobies and I’m kind of glad they weren’t air lifted into the audience during the show I went to. Of course most of my audience were men and the man sitting next to me howled as if he had never seen a female before. I think everything about it is awkward!

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    • I’m sorry!! No, don’t get me wrong, Vegas is a blast! But definitely don’t plan an entire week because everyone agrees you can really on handle a few days at best. I mean, everything is so flashy, everyone is drunk and gambling, and you’d be completely broke if you stayed a full week. I would highly suggest seeing one of the Vegas shows though because they are pretty awesome. And it’s fun to walk to all of the casinos like the Cosmopolitan and stuff. But be prepared that your eyes will feel like they are melting if you go during the summer months.

      Liked by 1 person

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