I did a twitter thing this morning and participated in a hashtag game. I don’t know who starts these daily hashtag trends but there’s always one particular hashtag other than the recent #Brangelina that people like to play along with. For instance, #WhatWouldMillenialsDo and #TheUSin3Words.
Anyways, I decided to play with the #DescribeYourselfin3FictionalCharacters bit this morning but I wanted to back up my claims with a few real-life examples as to why I fit these fictional characters.
1. April Ludgate
April always looks like she’s about to slice and dice someone. I’ve only seen the first few episodes of Parks and Recreation, but from what I’ve learned, April is a bit of a grump mostly because she has zero patience for stupid people and stupid things.
My example: A few years ago, I got called into a meeting at work. A meeting that I had absolutely nothing to do with, but my manager at the time felt like I needed to listen into the conversation. It was a property management company, and the maintenance man named Stan discussed the possibility of power washing the buildings. My manager, Jill, looked up from her iPhone with her perfectly painted ruby red nails with enthusiasm.
“OH! Can you please power wash the trees?” she asked. I stopped taking notes and grabbed a handful of peanut butter pretzels, shoving all of them into my mouth to prevent me from snorting.
Stan stopped for a moment and stared.
“Uh…yeah, sure. I can…power wash the trees,” he answered. What a doll, I thought.
“Oh, good. I hate dirty trees,” Jill said.
2. Pam Beasley
You might think that I’m tooting my own horn by saying I’m like Pam Beasley. Everyone wants to be Pam Beasley. She ends up with Jim Halpert for crying out loud! But I truly believe everyone has a little bit of Pam Beasley in them. She’s a pushover who loves a good laugh. She’s also incredibly awkward.
My example: I’ve been working at my current job for six months now, and some people still don’t know my name. There is one woman I work with who tends to spew out sentences that come off as…not so nice. Only she doesn’t realize that it’s not so nice. One day, she popped her head up from her computer and glanced at me. When I caught her staring, I jumped, startled by her presence for just an instant.
“I just really hate looking at you…” she said.
“….oh,” I answered. After what felt like 20 years, she finally continued this not-so-nice sentence.
“You’re just so young…”
Just like Jessica Day, I sing when not asked to sing, I dance when not asked to dance, I break for birds and squirrels and basically any animal I would consider hugging, I make cat noises when I feel it’s appropriate, and I basically just want to be your friend. She’s also really terrible at flirting.
My example: I have too many so I’m just going to list them all.
- If you’re in close proximity of me, there’s a 99% chance I will smack you in the face by accident.
- I wear a lot of dresses.
- If I try to be “sexy”, I look like an idiot.
- While my friends were flirting with guys in a bar, I somehow struck up a conversation with a sixty-something-year-old former Red Sox player. And it was an awesome evening.
- I once got stuck in an elevator for two hours.
- I think pick-up lines are hilarious and I wish guys used them more.
- I like to bake cookies and cupcakes, and bedazzle them.
- Any scene where Jessica Day makes a fool of herself, just think of me.
Please share your fictional characters with me.