Awkward, Humor, I Wasn't Worried, Thoughts, You're Fine

How to Get Out of Embarrassing Situations

I embarrass myself daily. Sometimes I’m aware of when it’s happening, other times I’m not. My embarrassing moments usually consist of oversharing, cracking jokes that nobody understands, walking into doors, tables, and walls (how DID that wall get there?), or stumbling on my words to the point where they are incoherent simply because I’m nervous.

dfsd

Here are some ideas I’ve come up with on how to get out of embarrassing situations.

1.) Just yell out words that come to mind.

“Kittens!”

“Sour Cream!”

“Infomercials!”

By simply shouting out random and irrelevant words, you are then distracting from the previous embarrassing moment with a new one that will both confuse and hopefully amuse the other person.

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If asked why you just yelled out (insert random word here), add an improv sentence that relates to the word.

Example:

“Kittens!”

“Jess, why did you just yell kittens?”

“They are just so fuzzy, and cute with little pink noses. I love them so much. Want to see this video?”

*Embarrassing crisis diverted*

2.) Shuffle your way out.

Learn to do a slight dance shuffle. As soon as the embarrassing moment has taken place and the awkward silence occurs, dance your way out of the encounter and move far, far away.

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3.) The classic “Hey! Look over there!”

Example:

Jess has just cracked a joke that was taken far too seriously by the group of individuals, and now they are staring, slurping on their beverages and trying to figure out the next move.

“Hey! Look at that over there!” she yells.

They all turn to look behind them.

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4.) Pull a Gone Girl

If you haven’t read the book or watched the movie, stop reading here if you don’t want any spoilers.

It’s the perfect plan. Simply fake your own death. Come up with a brand new identity.

Some things you will need to accomplish this mission:

  • Bleach – to clean the fake blood off the floor. Duh.
  • Hair dye
  • The complete opposite wardrobe from what you normally wear.
  • Lots of money
  • More money
  • Some sort of weapon, just in case.

fgfdd

5.) Keep Laughing

Laugh so hard, you look manic.

 

*Please share any methods you find useful!

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14 thoughts on “How to Get Out of Embarrassing Situations

  1. I don’t really know what I do. I might actually yell “Kittens” and not remember doing it. Nahh. I think I just avoid eye contact and slowly back away from the situation with my feet and then hide.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. So many thoughts… First, and I really hope this isn’t taken offensively, because I definitely mean it as a compliment, but sometimes, when I’m picturing you in situations, I have this image of Mabel from Gravity Falls in your place. I really hope that’s not taken in offense, but I think I could see how it would be. Because Mabel from Gravity Falls is 12 years old. And is a cartoon character.

    Second, there is a woman I work with who will frequently Moonwalk away after she makes an awkward comment. It’s hilarious.

    Third, please don’t pull a Gone Girl. That chick was crazy-go-nuts. That’s a clinical term.

    Finally, I have a fake laugh that I often lean on to break tension. I can turn it on and off like a faucet. I really should have been an actor. Sometimes, my fake laughter is a source of embarrassment for others. It really doesn’t bother me. But it’s loud and obnoxious. So it often draws the stares of strangers in crowded restaurants.

    PS – I really hope the Mabel thing wasn’t offensive. ‘Cause Gravity Falls is probably one of the most clever things my TV has seen in the last five years. True story.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hahaha okay so I’ve never seen Gravity Falls so I had to YouTube Mabel. It’s perfect. From the first ten seconds, I could already tell that I’m Mabel. No offense taken. Usually if there’s awkward silence and it wasn’t from my behavior but the behavior of someone else, I’ll start giggling and pointing out how awkward the silence is. That usually breaks the ice.

      Liked by 1 person

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