Awkward, Dating, Girls, Humor, Internet Things, My Idea Of Being An Adult, Thoughts, You're Fine

I Don’t Want to Be a Princess

We can go ahead and consider this a new Single Schmingle installment since I’ve discussed this very topic with Myka and Meghan. Bear with me here.

I always thought Mia Thermopolis was crazy. Who wouldn’t want to wake up one day and find out they’re a princess? The girl got a full blown makeover for free, a millions beautiful ball gowns, a tiara she got to wear occasionally, and full service at her disposal. Granted, if you’re introverted like Mia, all of that attention can make you feel like you have a thousand tiny ants crawling all over your body. You’re uncomfortable nearly all the time. You might even feel guilty. And I am exactly like that.

Something Colleen said to me last week struck a chord with me and I can’t shake it off. After I told her the complete switch in enthusiasm from Navy Man when I told him I wanted to be casual and friendly, she said, “You shouldn’t have said anything. You should have just let him treat you like the princess you are.”

“But I don’t want to be treated like a princess,” I said.

“Why the hell not?”

I thought about this for the past few days. I can’t be the only girl out there who feels uncomfortable using a guy to feel special, only to know that I’m not actually interested in him. I’m shocked that girls actually do this. They let these guys take them out to fancy restaurants, buy them presents, and then whisper to their girlfriends that they don’t really like him, they’re just waiting out the storm.

I feel weird if a guy even pays for me all the time. I just don’t think it’s necessary. I’m the type that if a man brings me to a fancy restaurant, I’ll order the cheapest item on the menu. I’m more of a hot-dog-cart-with-a-side-of-cheesy-fries kind of girl. But I know that’s just how my mom raised me. She always said, “Never depend on a man. Learn how to take care of yourself.” I think a mother with three daughters has to feed them that mindset nowadays. Especially a single mother.

Of course, it’s always nice to get pampered every once in a while. Some flowers or an ice cream run when I’m feeling down. But nothing major. I’ve been in relationships where I never got those things, mostly because we grew too comfortable with each other that we forgot how to appreciate one another. And even if those small gestures did happen, I was so surprised by the event that I was asking a million questions to figure out why it was happening.

I can’t help but wonder what would happen if the roles were reversed. What if was the one to ask a guy out on a date? What if was the one to court the guy around and pay for the date? This isn’t some feminist, all mighty woman power post. It’s just a thought. How would the date turn out in the end? Would it be the same? I feel like with every date, the guy is the one who is trying to impress, meanwhile, I think the girl should be equally impressive. We don’t give men enough credit. Some women out there might roll their eyes at that last statement but I’m serious. It takes a lot of guts to ask someone out. And then you have to take that person out and all of the pressure is on them to impress them, and make sure they’re having a good time. Here I am, nervous for nearly every single date, when it seems all I really have to do is stand there and look pretty, maybe laugh at his jokes, and share an anecdote or two. That’s my only job.

I’ve never laughed over a guy asking me out on a date. I’m always flattered, no matter who they are. But men get rejected all the time. For women, it’s once in a blue moon. And when it happens, it doesn’t feel good, does it? Let’s face it, ladies. When it comes to casually dating, we’re kind of spoiled. Even if you never make it to date number 2, you still got a free meal.

However, after discussing this with Myka and Meghan why we may perhaps feel weird about going on dates, no matter how long we’ve been doing it, it could be the slight chance that men have kind of given up. In 2017, a typical date is “Netflix and Chill”. We could have done that in the comfort of our own home. You invite us over to “watch a movie”. We know what that means, gentleman. We suddenly feel like they don’t want to actually get to know us, because who discusses life, hobbies, and family in the middle of a movie?

Of course, this post is all over the place. A lot of it may be contradicting. But that’s just because I’m another crazy woman who doesn’t know what she wants.

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Internet Things, Social Media, Thoughts

To My Internet Friends

Here’s a scary story for you:

I was nine-years-old when I entered my first chat room. Don’t ask me how or why I ended up in a chat room at the age of nine because I couldn’t tell you. The internet is a strange place. I got a random message from someone named Ashley asking how I was doing. She seemed nice. She just happened to be nine-years-old too. And just happened to live in blah, blah, blah, (same town) New Hampshire.

What are the odds? I thought.

My mother found me talking to “Ashley” and naturally freaked out and made me log off. She explained that “Ashley” was most likely not nine-years-old, and “Ashley” could have been a man. It clicked for me, and since then, the Internet has scared me.

Of course, times have changed drastically since then. The Internet seems to be our main source of communication. When I first started my blog, I didn’t know what to expect, but one of the first pieces of advice I read from other, more established bloggers was this:

Don’t be afraid to talk to bloggers.

They highly suggested commenting on other blog sites to communicate and engage with them. In the world of blogging, it’s okay to talk to strangers despite what our parents taught us when we were little. In fact, it’s expected of you. I thought about it and realized that it made total sense. How else are you supposed to get traffic on your blog if no one knows you exist?

Once I started communicating with other bloggers, I began forming close friendships with each of them. For some bloggers, we started emailing each other. And for only a couple, we began texting. I started thinking about how I don’t find any of this weird like I used to.

There’s always a chance there is a serial killer loose on WordPress, so there’s no 100% guarantee that you are safe. We immerse ourselves into the lives of other people we find funny and thoughtful that they no longer feel like strangers. I consider some of these bloggers as my best and closest friends.

Now, to someone who doesn’t blog, they may find this concept a bit strange, and a little sad. Let me dispute those feelings. As an introverted person, I can be pretty shy when meeting new people. I can be reserved, quiet, and maybe seem a little boring. It wasn’t until I started blogging that I began feeling a bit more comfortable in my own skin due to the support of my blogging community. Meeting new people intimidated me. I find myself cracking more jokes and being my naturally sarcastic self when in the presence of someone new, and when people laugh or freak out because I just referenced Willy Wonka, it feels like a breath of fresh air. The awkward hump in my shoulder has disappeared.

Whenever I get a message or a text from one of my Internet friends, my day is instantly brighter. These are the type of friends every person should strive for. One blogger in particular has helped me out quite a bit whether he realizes it or not. When I lived in California, I didn’t have many friends, I missed my family, I was unhappy most of the time, and I couldn’t sleep due to stress. This blogger entertained me both on and off WordPress. I’m sure he has no clue how much he helped me since our conversations were mostly about silly topics, but he was and still is a wonderful distraction to the chaos and confusion in my life. For once, it was nice talking to someone about things other than money or jobs. It was nice discussing our favorite TV shows and what college was like for us. It was nice feeling like a kid again. Luckily, I have found other bloggers who give me that same boost of energy. In a way, this is why I blog – I never want to lose sight of these people.

It’s complicated explaining these friendships to outsiders mostly because I’ve never met these friends of mine, except for one. As bloggers, we try our best to show our most charming selves whether it’s self-deprecation, our talents, our accomplishments, or our humor. I understand that many of my friends could be entirely different in person, which is hard for me to grasp. For all I know, these people could have qualities that are so hateful or rude or narcissistic, but you’ll never know until you meet them. Or they may not even like me in person, which is just as terrifying to think about. I talk to a few of these bloggers nearly every day, sometimes all day long. It’s hard for me to not bring them up in conversation with other people. They’re in my life and that can’t be ignored.

Does it bother me that I’ve never met these people? Absolutely. I hate not being familiar with their facial expressions, or what truly makes them laugh, or even what their laugh sounds like. I don’t get the full package but merely a piece of them in small increments. When you confide in someone, not only are you listening to them, but you’re watching them speak. I believe you don’t truly know what a person is thinking until you observe them in conversation. We all have a fixed idea of what each of us are like in real life, so I understand the appeal of staying behind the computer screen because that image could be tarnished forever if met face to face. But I’m still, and will forever be curious to no end.

My point in this post is this: I may never meet some of you. Ever. One day, one of us will stop blogging and will never hear from each other again. It’s a scary thought, but it’s a fact. So to my blogging and Internet friends, just know, I’m grateful for your existence. I wouldn’t be who I am today without you. I appreciate and cherish your friendship, and hope that it will continue for many years to come.

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Humor, Internet Things, Thoughts

101 Things That Make Me Happy

1.) The weeks leading up to fall, and I wake up to a foggy morning.

2.) When my cat follows me around everywhere.

3.) Losing myself in my thoughts while driving.

4.) Long drives

5.) When someone tickles me, no matter how ticklish I am.

6.) The way a dog wags its tail when they look at me.

7.) Strawberries

8.) My Nana’s pet names for me: “Sweetie”, “Schnookums”, and “Slut”

9.) The way my family members name off every child before eventually figuring out my name.

10.) Bar stools – they are the perfect place to talk.

11.) Cheesy Fries

12.) Graphic T’s

13.) Twitter group chats

14.) When my nephew asks me to read him a bedtime story.

15.) Painting

16.) Cider doughnuts

17.) Smelling books

18.) Gossiping with my hair dresser

19.) When my cat sucks on my finger

20.) Bread

21.) Italian food

22.) Holding hands

23.) Tree branches

24.) Buttercup flowers

25.) Reading

26.) Spooning

27.) Long walks, alone

28.) Watching previews at the movies

29.) Dumping M&M’s into my popcorn

30.) Croissants

31.) Body pillows

32.) Swimming pools

33.) Waking up to birds chirping, knowing spring is approaching.

34.) Sleeping in

35.) The smell of coffee

36.) Going out to breakfast

37.) Staying in and watching movies with my mom

38.) The way penguins run

39.) Rolls on a bulldog

40.) The Starbucks “You Are Here” Collection

41.) Singing “Sweet Caroline” at Fenway

42.) Pulling apart and reorganizing my book shelf

43.) When someone laughs at my jokes

44.) Dancing

45.) Slipping under the covers right before bed

46.) Baking

47.) Feeling a baby kick inside a pregnant belly

48.) A hot shower

49.) Thinking about when I was a kid and helped my Grampy peel corn for dinner.

50.) Melted Nutella

51.) Fireplaces

52.) Hot Cocoa during a snow storm

53.) Christmas lights

54.) Music

55.) Quilts

56.) When someone whispers in my ear

57.) Shopping for presents

58.) Sun bathing

59.) Hearing a baby laugh

60.) Cherry Blossoms

61.) Putting on makeup

62.) Train rides

63.) Purring cats

64.) The sound of waves crashing

65.) Feeling the warmth of a coffee mug

66.) New pens

67.) When my sisters and I start singing and dancing to Michael Jackson and Cyndi Lauper

68.) When my friend Colleen sings karaoke

69.) Going through old boxes of memories

70.) Cooking dinner for myself

71.) Singing in the shower

72.) Getting in a cleaning mode

73.) Sniffing candles

74.) Browsing through bookstores

75.) Receiving handmade cards from my five-year-old niece

76.) Vintage stores

77.) Passing by the fields of windmills in Texas and Oklahoma

78.) Watching the kiss cam in arenas

79.) Making s’mores

80.) Socks

81.) Pancakes – preferably chocolate chip pancakes

82.) Lounging in my towel twenty minutes after I’ve showered

83.) Funky sunglasses

84.) Dusting

85.) Listening to Grampy tell riddled jokes

86.) The way my mom’s cats talk to me

87.) Chinese food

88.) Church bells

89.) Horseback riding

90.) Playing with goats

91.) Bathrobes

92.) Flash mobs

93.) Shooting stars

94.) Are you ever up so late at night, and it’s dead quiet outside, but you still hear this weird humming noise in the distance? It must be the highway, but you’re never sure. I love that sound.

95.) Summer dresses

96.) When I overhear guys talking sports

97.) Waking up to drool on my pillow

98.) Postcards

99.) Scarves

100.) When my aunt’s dog jumps into the pool

101.) Making lists

Please share some happy things with me 🙂

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Awkward, Festivities, Internet Things, My Idea Of Being An Adult, Out of the Ordinary, Thoughts, You're Fine

Dear America

I still remember the presidential election of 2000. I was in the fourth grade learning about politics for the first time. Since most kids typically vote for the candidate their families vote for, I was rooting for George Bush. I come from a mostly Republican family. My best friend at the time, Megan, came from a mostly Democrat family, and her vote was for Al Gore. When Bush won, I jumped up and down for joy while Megan kicked her feet around saying, “Gosh darn it!” and we still ate lunch together as if nothing ever happened.

The same exact thing happened in 2004 with George Bush and John Kerry. I still managed to keep my Democrat friends close even after George Bush won. So, I ask America, what in the world happened to us? Unless I just grew up, opened my eyes, and realized what was actually going on.

The 2008 election was just a small taste for what we were in for: hatred. My best friend at the time, Katherine, was voting Obama and she let me know every day what a terrible mistake it would be if I rooted for McCain. I must admit, that election was during my senior year of high school and I honestly didn’t pay attention as much as others did because I had college applications and SAT’s on the brain. But, my family was voting for McCain. However, that didn’t alter Katherine’s hateful and sarcastic comments one bit.

The 2012 election, I was paying attention to the best of my ability. I voted Romney. And from a sorta-kinda-Republican/Independent point of view, this is what happened:

My college campus was jam packed with Obama buses to bring students to the nearest town hall to vote. Thousands of students were shoving Obama signs in my face, yelling at me to vote. Most of my friends spent the day screaming at the television about how much Romney sucked, and nobody was voting for him (which is ridiculous since obviously people were voting for him). I actually had people who I considered close friends express their hatred for Republicans, which made me uncomfortable to no end.

After Obama won, I wasn’t upset. I went to bed and slept like a baby. However, a former co-worker on Facebook figured out that I didn’t vote for Obama, and it MUST have been because he’s black right? Which he then felt the need to express all over the Facebook page of my employer at the time, asking them how they could hire a racist? That racist was apparently me, and he wrote my name out in all caps. Luckily, my boss was able to delete the comment immediately and block the person. But that didn’t stop the cooks from making racist jokes every time I walked by. I spent most of my shift in the bathroom crying.

Ever since that particular election, I’ve been too afraid to voice my own opinion in a country where we claim we can go ahead and do that. Between the Facebook posts bashing not just Republicans but Democrats too, to the unwanted political conversations where all I do is fold my hands and stare at the floor, it’s become too much. I understand this election has turned us into a mockery for other countries. A sort of lesson on “What Not To Do”. But I am here to say that whoever my friends and family vote for, I’m not going to berate them for their choices, and neither should the rest of you.

I haven’t asked one single person who they are voting for because it’s simply none of my business. I was raised to “never bring up politics at the dinner table” and I maintain that even more now. We have to get a grip and remember that not every Republican is so far right and not every Democrat is so far left. For every person you make fun of, whether they are voting Clinton or Trump, you are insulting someone you know or their families. It baffles me that I feel the need to write this to adults. I’ve been wanting to say these words since 2008 and I don’t want to be afraid anymore. It’s not fair.

So, whether you’re a Republican, Democrat, Independent, or what have you, I wish you all a safe Election Day. Don’t forget to stash those nips in your pocket for later.

fsdf

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Anecdote, Humor, Internet Things

#DescribeYourselfin3FictionalCharacters

I did a twitter thing this morning and participated in a hashtag game. I don’t know who starts these daily hashtag trends but there’s always one particular hashtag other than the recent #Brangelina that people like to play along with. For instance, #WhatWouldMillenialsDo and #TheUSin3Words.

Anyways, I decided to play with the #DescribeYourselfin3FictionalCharacters bit this morning but I wanted to back up my claims with a few real-life examples as to why I fit these fictional characters.

1. April Ludgate

5c948297f52371f71f87872f1e763d5a-12-april-ludgateApril always looks like she’s about to slice and dice someone. I’ve only seen the first few episodes of Parks and Recreation, but from what I’ve learned, April is a bit of a grump mostly because she has zero patience for stupid people and stupid things.

My example: A few years ago, I got called into a meeting at work. A meeting that I had absolutely nothing to do with, but my manager at the time felt like I needed to listen into the conversation. It was a property management company, and the maintenance man named Stan discussed the possibility of power washing the buildings. My manager, Jill, looked up from her iPhone with her perfectly painted ruby red nails with enthusiasm.

“OH! Can you please power wash the trees?” she asked. I stopped taking notes and grabbed a handful of peanut butter pretzels, shoving all of them into my mouth to prevent me from snorting.

Stan stopped for a moment and stared.

“Uh…yeah, sure. I can…power wash the trees,” he answered. What a doll, I thought.

“Oh, good. I hate dirty trees,” Jill said.

200w

2. Pam Beasley

7824721ae4e29abb475109893a3dc265You might think that I’m tooting my own horn by saying I’m like Pam Beasley. Everyone wants to be Pam Beasley. She ends up with Jim Halpert for crying out loud! But I truly believe everyone has a little bit of Pam Beasley in them. She’s a pushover who loves a good laugh. She’s also incredibly awkward.

My example: I’ve been working at my current job for six months now, and some people still don’t know my name. There is one woman I work with who tends to spew out sentences that come off as…not so nice. Only she doesn’t realize that it’s not so nice. One day, she popped her head up from her computer and glanced at me. When I caught her staring, I jumped, startled by her presence for just an instant.

“I just really hate looking at you…” she said.

*long pause*

“….oh,” I answered. After what felt like 20 years, she finally continued this not-so-nice sentence.

“You’re just so young…”

sd3. Jessica Day

jess-new-girl-hair

Just like Jessica Day, I sing when not asked to sing, I dance when not asked to dance, I break for birds and squirrels and basically any animal I would consider hugging, I make cat noises when I feel it’s appropriate, and I basically just want to be your friend. She’s also really terrible at flirting.

My example: I have too many so I’m just going to list them all.

  • If you’re in close proximity of me, there’s a 99% chance I will smack you in the face by accident.
  • I wear a lot of dresses.
  • If I try to be “sexy”, I look like an idiot.
  • While my friends were flirting with guys in a bar, I somehow struck up a conversation with a sixty-something-year-old former Red Sox player. And it was an awesome evening.
  • I once got stuck in an elevator for two hours.
  • I think pick-up lines are hilarious and I wish guys used them more.
  • I like to bake cookies and cupcakes, and bedazzle them.
  • Any scene where Jessica Day makes a fool of herself, just think of me.

ghdffgdfgdgf

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Please share your fictional characters with me.

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Art, Connecticut, Festivities, I'm not a mommy blogger, Internet Things, Manic Monday, Out of the Ordinary

Art Project: Acrylic-ing

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A few weeks ago, I decided to buy a haul of canvases from Michael’sI usually like to venture into Joann Fabrics until I found out I had to buy a cart in order to use one. I walked through the store completely unaware of the amount of things I was going to grab and then realized that it would be best to grab a cart. I pulled and yanked and cursed silently, wondering why I was not able to pull the cart away. A cashier asked if I needed a quarter…so that was the end of that.

I’ve been taking a short break from watercolors and decided to move onto acrylics. If I’m going to use acrylics, it’s best to go big or go home. All of my canvases are 16 x 20, therefore bigger than I normally use.

A long time ago in high school, my art teacher assigned us to paint micros. That basically means taking something, and blowing it up to show the detail of it. For instance, in high school, I did a close up oil painting of an orange. One girl did a lobster claw. So I decided to continue painting something similar. With my favorite season approaching, I focused on a detailed sunflower that calmed my excitement.

hisface

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The painting, which I titled His Face, is on the website but is not for sale as of yet! 1. I titled the sunflower His Face mostly because I just finished reading Emma Donoghue’s novel Room, which little boy Jack calls the sun “God’s face”. Naturally, it was the first thing that came to mind. 2. I’m waiting to put it up for sale because I’ve applied to have the painting appear in SPACE 776 in Brooklyn for the 2016 Bushwick Open Studio. Each applicant has an automatic spot in the studio for the week of September 30-October 6 for a chance to sell the painting. If the painting does not sell through the studio, I will be putting it up for sale on my website.

This is an exciting time of learning myself through abstract art. My next piece will be a three canvas painting of the ocean that I’m starting to grow fond of.

image24

image33

I have many ideas for future micro paintings such as doughnuts, butterfly wings, elephants, etc. Any suggestions in the comments would be greatly appreciated!

Before painting, I didn’t know much about submitting works to galleries or contests until I started doing my research. I’m still learning the process, but my only advice to other artists out there is to search and search and search in your area. I promise there are plenty of opportunities to put yourself out there. For instance, literary journals take art submissions, and some coffee shops will hang and sell your work for a small commission of course, and there are plenty of contests either locally or in the nearest city. It doesn’t hurt to try. Even though it only costs $25 to submit my painting to SPACE 776, it will take a half a day’s work, trains, and subways just to haul the painting all the way to Brooklyn. But it will be worth it in the end, even if it doesn’t sell.

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Humor, Internet Things, My Idea Of Being An Adult, You're Fine

Five Years FAUXward

I haven’t watched the summer finale of Pretty Little Liars yet, so please, no spoilers. But honestly, I’ve grown to not care anymore. It’s the same predictable crap over and over again. SOMEONE DIES. “Oops! Jokes on you guys!”, says Marlene King. I’m going to guess that someone dies in the summer finale, or gets close enough to death to scare the bejesus out of viewers. What bugs me is that none of the liars are actually ever close to dying compared to all of the other characters. They’ve had close calls but realistically, we all knew those bitches were not going to die. Looking back, their close calls are comical. Like in season one when Toby chases Emily out of the dance and she has this weird fall and somehow breaks her arm. Or Spencer getting choked by Ian in the bell tower, very Poe-like by the way. Hanna has had more brushes of death than anyone else when she gets run over by the car, and then most recently held hostage. Oh yeah, and let’s not forget Aria disappearing from a train FULL OF PEOPLE leaving her dramatic Leonardo di Caprio hand print against the window only to find her in a coffin with an irrelevant dead guy.

dfds

They aired the “Five Years Forward” back in January, and I was on board with everyone else, excited to see a change in the show. I was looking forward to seeing how the girls progressed in the course of five years, but I was met with disappointment because absolutely nothing changed. Let’s discuss these “changes” Marlene King had in store for us:

Careers

Spencer is/was some big time political advocate of some sorts, working in Washington D.C. I wouldn’t have been surprised if she was the President’s assistant within a year or two. Hanna quit her insane assistant to a designer job and is now happily starting her own clothing line with the help of Lucas who is a millionaire all on his own at the age of twenty-three. Aria landed an editorial job at a publishing house and is now going to be a best-selling author. Let’s not forget Allison, who is a high school English teacher after spending most of her high school career in hiding, yet somehow managed to finish college and get her teaching certificate.

eadfdf

I thought these girls were supposed to be fresh out of college? What happened to the unpaid internships and eating Chinese food out of the container in the dark because you can’t afford electricity? Or the fetching of coffee because you’re at the bottom of the totem pole?

The only liar who has the most realistic job right after college is Emily, who is now a bartender. Good for you, Em! You’re keepin’ it real.

*I realize she hasn’t actually finished college yet, but you get the picture.*

Relationships

Everyone is getting married. Hanna was engaged, but BIG SURPRISE, now she’s not. Toby is engaged to someone irrelevant and is currently building a house for his love in Maine. Aria and Ezra were about to elope in Italy until they found out Nicole might still be alive (and then when they found out she wasn’t, Aria so badly wanted to throw a dance party to celebrate her continuous death). Allison eloped with that psycho Elliot and then tripped on a bump in a rug that somehow Elliot planted, and we all watched her fall dramatically down a flight of stairs. I laughed out loud.

Also, everyone except for Spencer somehow ended up with their ex. We all know the Emily and Paige story will continue.

dad

Alcohol

Now that the liars are of age, they obviously will be drinking in every single scene.

fgfg

Here’s how it actually works after college: you go to your shitty job, come home after sitting in bumper to bumper traffic, put on your sweats, throw on Friends, eat take-out, and then remember at 10pm that you should have had a glass of wine, go to bed instead.

Sticky Situations

It really hit home for me last week when the girls found the zip drive that contained all of the videos from when they were in the bunker. As it turns out, Noel Kahn was in on everything the whole time. You could see his face clear as day. Spencer wanted to hand that shit over to the police but Hanna was nowhere to be found because she was too busy being stupid, trying to trap Noel and nearly killing herself in the process. The girls were all kumbaya about it and were like, “Hanna isn’t here. It’s only right that we do this thing together.”

sfdfsd

Why?! They were acting like they were having a girls day and were about to go get their nails done and were scared Hanna would feel left out if she wasn’t informed first. So naturally, they waited like the dumbasses that they are. Spencer hears a noise in her house, freaks out, sees a shadow and OH LOOK, THE ZIP DRIVE IS GONE. Any chance to take down Noel Kahn is ruined.

Congrats, girls. You’ve done it again.

Their common sense and maturity level is still at an all time low.

And how many mysterious love children are going to turn up in this show? Your estimates are much appreciated.

I guarantee the series will end wrapped up in pretty paper with a nice big bow on top. Everyone will get what they want.

P.S. The guy who plays Marco, Spencer’s new love interest, is like 40 years old….

Previous Liars posts:

The Fundamental Dynamics of All Things Ridiculous Portrayed in Pretty Little Liars

Another Pretty Little Liars Discussion

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Awkward, Humor, Internet Things, Memories, News, Out of the Ordinary

The Stages of Disbelief When Aaron Carter Follows You on Twitter

I was in the middle of sketching a potential painting for later when I randomly decided to look through my followers list on Twitter. I’m not sure what prompted me to do it but I was shocked by what I found.

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I did a double take when I noticed the official check mark sign.

I looked even closer now.image1

“Aaron Carter? As in, Aaron’s Party?

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Stage 1: Confirmation

I stared at his Twitter page to make sure it was actually Aaron Effing Carter.

Yep. Yep. Definitely him.

Stage 2: Confusion

Why on earth is Aaron Carter following me on Twitter? Did I tweet something strange? Ohhhhhhh, he’s promoting his music. It’s kind of like when those random DJ’s start following you just get you to listen to their tracks. Or those guys who hand you CD’s in Hollywood on the sidewalk. It’s the same thing. EXCEPT IT’S AARON CARTER.

asq

Stage 3: Background Check

I realized that Aaron Carter following me may not be “new”. I decided to creep into my own history and find out when he decided to click the magical button that is my Twitter page.

TWO WEEKS. He’s been following me for two weeks and I didn’t even notice. It doesn’t help that his Twitter name is “KiD CaRTer”, which basically just looks like an AIM screen name from 2003.

I probably figured this was some fake account trying to gain followers and would unfollow me within the hour. Which, by the way, I question that tactic quite a bit. Some of these people follow thousands and thousands of people in such a short amount of time, and I’ve noticed, if I don’t follow them back within a reasonable time frame, they unfollow me. Do they write down all of the people they followed to keep track so that they can unfollow them? Who even has time for that? It’s the only way that would make sense.

Stage 4: Nostalgia

While I hummed Aaron’s Party in my head, I tweeted my amazement over it all. It turned real this morning. I woke up to a direct message sent by…you guessed it.

Now, I’m not going to completely swoon at this moment because the direct message basically just said to watch his newest music video, and “Enjoy! ;)”

Wink face.

I didn’t respond but the very idea that I could have a conversation with the little bro of Nick Carter was thrilling. How far can I take this conversation? I thought. Probably not far. I’ll steal Anna Kendrick’s words and say that I’m a “scrappy little nobody”.

So I had a fan girl moment and reminisced on his Lizzie McGuire kiss with Hilary Duff.

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It could have been me.

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Art, Humor, I Wasn't Worried, I'm not a mommy blogger, Internet Things, News, Out of the Ordinary

Art Project: Bigger and Better Things

It’s been two weeks since I announced my newly created art site, and I’m thrilled to say that I’ve sold two paintings so far! I didn’t expect it to happen so soon.

What I’ve learned during this short amount of time in business is that word-of-mouth is a great way to sell your work. I want to thank my friends, family and blogging community for helping me so far. I couldn’t have done it without you!

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In case any of you were wondering, the items under my portfolio on my website can also be sold if requested. Ironically enough, the two paintings I sold were not originally for sale mostly because they were “old”, or something I was practicing. For instance, the Versailles landscape I sold was something I was trying out one evening and I posted the photo to Instagram. I didn’t expect someone to have an interest in purchasing it until they contacted me. That is another lesson I’ve learned over the last few months. Instagram has played a large role in my ability to get my work out into the world.

Here is a quick update:

  • I recently visited my grandparents over the weekend and they gave me an old easel. Which means I can now move onto bigger works of art! I’d like to move onto canvas and acrylics, along with larger watercolors.
  • I’ve decided to practice my landscaping, which is how I ended up selling my Versailles inspired watercolor. IMG_1047
  • There are also other creative ways to incorporate your art other than paper and canvas. I experimented with a giraffe ink drawing I did a few months ago and placed it on a plain white t-shirt and it actually came out wonderful, all thanks to Zazzle! image3(2)image1(6)
  • I came across an old box labeled, “Jessie’s Memories” and many of the items played like a time capsule. I found a shoe box of random items I put together in middle school, some of which contained old notes between friends, movie tickets, and my 8th grade graduation packet. Some of you might be confused as to why we had an 8th grade graduation packet. Our graduation was bigger than my high school graduation. There were only 65 kids in my grade, and most of us had known each other since kindergarten. Many of us were splitting off, with nearly half of the kids attending a private high school instead. We had a million awards given out, and a prophecy written to predict where each of us would end up in the future. Well it turns out my prophecy was that I would be selling my artwork, which is weirdly accurate. My friend Jackie’s prophecy was that she would run a circus, which I guess is partially true if you want to read her blog here.

I’m looking forward to the summer ending and the start of the fall season! I’m already thinking about my fall-inspired paintings.

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Books, Humor, I'm not a mommy blogger, Internet Things

Harry Potter made me realize I have strange taste in men.

No, I did not have a crush on Harry Potter. Some consider him an underdog, but I don’t. He was viewed as a hero from the time he was six months old when he “defeated” Voldemort with his cuteness. A few weeks ago, Mr. Jess and I were discussing Harry Potter when we saw Me Before You because Matthew Lewis plays a self-obsessed athlete. Most of you remember him as buck-toothed Neville Longbottom.

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Neville Longbottom was the character I had a crush on. He’s the most underrated character in the whole series until pretty much the end when he surprised everyone with his awesomeness I already knew he had. I thought he was so adorable in the books and the movies. I looked at him with puppy dog eyes.

Then suddenly, KAPOW, he appeared out of nowhere looking like this:

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Everyone on social media went nuts for the former Neville Longbottom. Most of the comments were, “Neville got hot!”

He was always cute, you fools! Stop jumping on my bandwagon!

Yeah, you! I said get. Shoo!

So now, everyone loves him.

Even Mr. Jess was surprised that my life-long Harry Potter crush was Neville Longbottom, which made him curious as to the other celebrities I admire. When I told him, he only had questions…and confusion.

For the longest time, I had a crush on Michael Cera ever since I watched Juno.

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I still daydream about marrying Dylan O’Brien.

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“Dylan effing O’Brien!?”

“YES. 100% YES.”

So Mr. Jess decided to test me, and it didn’t turn out the way he expected.

“David Beckham,” he started. I made a grotesque face. “Are you serious? You do realize he was voted one of the sexiest men alive, right?

“Yeah, I know…” I answered. “He’s whatever.”

“He’s also one of the greatest soccer players,” he defended.

“Eh. I don’t really watch soccer so that doesn’t affect me.”

“Alexander Skarsgård.”

“Who?”

“He’s in the new Tarzan movie. Trust me, once you see a picture, you’ll probably want to see it.”

He pulled out his phone and showed me a photo.

“Nah,” I replied.

“I don’t understand. You’re into really strange men.”

“I don’t like a ton of muscle. They look like beef cakes,” I answered.

I’ve already confessed my love for Conan O’Brien too.

“What is it about them exactly?”

I thought for a minute or two to figure out what all of these men had in common.

“They make me laugh,” I answered.

“But it’s David Beckham…you’re the only girl I know who doesn’t seem interested.”

“He’s married to Posh Spice. How funny could he possibly be?”

My suspicion for funny men was confirmed last night after finishing The Butterfly Effect Harry Potter and the Cursed Child. By the end of the book, Neville Longbottom was dropped down to number two. Wanna know who took first place?

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DRACO MALFOY.

Weird, right? He was such a little shit throughout the whole series and then the 8th (and hopefully final) book, he charmed me.

It all started when the gang arrived in Godric’s Hollow, and Hermione mentions that it has turned into kind of a vacation spot for muggles. Draco looks around thoughtfully and says, “I can see why. Oh look, a farmer’s market.” Say that out loud in a British accent and tell me you didn’t just fall in love with this demon seed.

He turned into such a dork, and I love it. On top of that, he created the most adorable child and best friend to Albus Potter, Scorpius.

Sorry, Neville. You’ve been replaced.

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I Wasn't Worried, Internet Things, Memories, My Idea Of Being An Adult, Out of the Ordinary, Social Media, Things I Should Have Solved A Year Ago, You're Fine

My Life Six Months After Facebook

I made some drastic changes at the beginning of the year. Over the holidays, when I realized California was no longer a place I wanted to be, I packed my bags, moved back in with my mom in New Hampshire, found a job, moved to Connecticut, and started new.

It was during this time that I decided to get rid of Facebook forever.

Well, everyone knows it’s not forever. Unfortunately, you can deactivate your account, but it’s still there whenever you feel the urge to check it, but it was a step in the right direction.

There were a lot of questions and reactions surrounding my breakup with Facebook. Are you doing it because of your recent breakup? Are you trying to avoid someone? Is it because you’re looking for a job? You’ll be back, right?

No, to all of these.

I actually wanted to get rid of my page years ago, but there were many people fighting against it that I raised my white flag instead.

I did it because I personally felt like I wasn’t going to figure my life out with the distraction of Facebook. It was a place where I constantly compared my life to other people. My page claimed I had around 500 friends, when in reality, I didn’t actually have many friends. At the time, I had around 2-3 friends I constantly spoke to, and still do to this day. While most people would say that’s satisfying, it only goes so far when most of those people live in different parts of the country.

I needed to figure out what I wanted to do, where I wanted to be, and who I wanted to spend my time with without Facebook and all of its people influencing those decisions. I wanted to be able to do just about anything without everyone knowing about it. I didn’t like the feeling that all eyes were on me, watching my every move and judging my every decision. If I want to pull an all-nighter and walk aimlessly around New York City, I don’t want the entire world to know it, and proceed to ask me questions. In hindsight, I just wanted to be left alone.

It’s been approximately six months since I left Facebook, with only a handful of times I’ve logged on only to grab a picture or two. I’ve noticed some pretty liberating changes since then that I’d like to share with all of you.

1. Meeting and getting to know friends organically.

Since moving to Connecticut, I’ve met a large number of new friends. Back when I had Facebook, I most likely would have become friends with them after meeting them the first time, creeped on their Facebook page, and that’s how I would have gotten to know them.

Oh, I see Amanda went to Ireland a few months ago. She must like to travel.

Brian is constantly confessing his love for Hillary Clinton. He must be into politics.

Our real-life conversations would have been mediocre at best because we would have felt like we already knew each other based on our Facebook page. Without Facebook, I have no outside knowledge about them, therefore I ask them questions and really show that I care, and vice versa.

2. Absolutely no drama.

Everyone deals with stress whether it’s work-related, or family issues, but Facebook stress is a real sucker and is completely unnecessary. Since I left Facebook, I haven’t been wrapped up in an internet argument, or been subtly insulted by some unknowing individual not realizing their statuses affect their “friends”. There wasn’t a day I didn’t get upset about something because of Facebook, but now, it’s one less thing I stress about and that feeling goes a long way.

I logged on the other day to retrieve an old photo to my phone, and the first status that popped up was a complaint about society, or something like it. I instantly felt claustrophobic and wanted to throw my phone against the wall. It’s kind of similar to that parenting method – if you’re anxious and stressed, your child will be too.

3. Reaching out.

When I hear good news through the grapevine, I now have to personally text or call the person to congratulate them. I feel like that makes a difference, even if they don’t say that it does. For instance, a friend of mine from my MFA program recently signed a 3-4 book deal with a publishing house. I don’t talk to him much, at least not since I graduated, but when I found out, I immediately texted him to send my congrats and asked him all about it. It seemed like he really appreciated it, especially since I’m sure many people said similar things to him on his status.

When I heard a friend of mine got engaged, I texted her to ask how he proposed, and I got the full story and all of her gushyness. I would not have gotten that same experience through Facebook. I certainly feel like I’ve become a better friend and person because of this.

4. Focusing on healthy relationships.

I’m no longer wasting my energy on relationships that are actually just acquaintances. I get to share happy events with those who matter the most, and eliminating those who only spoke to me out of convenience from Facebook. There were some people I considered close friends, and I haven’t heard from them in months. At times, it’s upsetting, but then I remind myself that I’m now surrounded by friends who like speaking to me, and put in the effort to spend time with me.

When Mr. Jess and I decided to start dating, it was pretty nice not having the entire world know about it. Not that I was trying to hide him or anything, but we didn’t have the distraction of everyone asking questions or sticking their noses where it didn’t belong. Everyone got to meet me naturally, and vice  versa. There had been too many times in the past when a significant other and I changed our relationship status, and then ex-boyfriends and girlfriends fluttered in like a pack of cluster flies, sending messages and throwing things completely out of whack. It kind of puts a damper on the honeymoon stage.

Mr. Jess and I got to focus on each other instead, and it has made all the difference in how we approach our relationship. The real beauty of it was when he texted me the other night saying that he realized he never changed his relationship status and he actually didn’t care at all, and for once, he was just focused on being happy. It made me realize that I’d never had a relationship before that wasn’t announced to everyone through some form of social media. I guess that’s growing up millennial.


Facebook has way too much of our past – where we’ve been, who we’ve interacted with, what we’ve said and done. I don’t miss one thing about Facebook. It was the best decision I ever made.

Have you ever thought about leaving it? If so, why? Tell me your thoughts on the matter! It seems as though the Facebook walls are slowly crashing down.

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Humor, Internet Things, Rant, Sarcasm, Social Media, You're Fine

2016 Pet Peeves

It’s been a little over a year since my last post about my pet peeves which means I have a new set of pet peeves to share with all of you.

1. The Upcoming Election

I will not tell any of you who I’d prefer as president because to be quite honest, whether I say Trump or Clinton, I’ll get backlash for it no matter what, so what’s the point? There’s a pretty good chance I won’t even vote this year.

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Before you’re all like, “JESS. YOU HAVE TO. IT’S YOUR AMERICAN RESPONSIBILITY.” I must make things clear that I actually don’t have to do anything. I have the RIGHT to vote, meaning, I don’t have to if I don’t want to.

Secondly, I’m responsible enough to realize that I’m not “in” with the politics enough to even make a decision. I don’t watch the debates/conventions because I’d rather knit my cat a sweater. I truly don’t understand most of it, so why sit through the drivel?

Before you’re all like, “You should try to understand it and educate yourself.” I should also be flossing more but I don’t do that either.

I’ve come to realize that no matter who becomes our next president, all I’ll hear are complaints for the next 4-8 years just like we do with every president. MOVING ON.

2. “The Game” on Social Media

What I’m about to complain about will make me sound like I’m five. But I don’t care. Every person I’ve talked to about this has admitted it bothers them as well. I’m looking at you, Paul! Paul and I called it, “The Game”.

It’s when you find someone you knew from maybe work, or high school, or college, and you follow them. We will use the Instagram platform for this as it seems to matter the most to me. I’ll follow that person, genuinely wondering what they have been up to. And then they post something the next day and you realize….that motherfucker never followed you back. This has been happening to me a lot lately and I can’t seem to figure out why. I’m not talking about people I briefly met four years ago. I’m talking about people I’ve known since THE FIRST GRADE. People I worked with EVERY SINGLE DAY. It’s insulting, really. I stumbled across this app called Followers + for Instagram. I felt silly downloading it but it tells you your stats for your Instagram account, and since I’m promoting my artwork on there, it seemed like it would be useful. There’s a section on the app that tells you who unfollowed you, or who you may be following and they haven’t reciprocated, and vice versa. I decided to take a look at who never followed me back. It was either a huge mistake, or a complete blessing because it was an alarming number of people. A ridiculous number of people I went to middle school, high school, and college with. I recently followed a guy I knew all throughout high school and he never acknowledged it. AND WE WENT OUT ON A DATE. My big brother from my grad program? Ignored me. A girl I stayed with in California for an entire month? Ignored me.

You guys are my friends. Am I not a likable person or something? I understand none of you have met me, but my personality on my blog pretty much mirrors my personality in person. There’s really not much of a difference. I may have a slightly bigger nose than you imagined but that’s it. I understand that a lot of people may just be oblivious and not notice when someone they know follows them. But after YEARS of the same person liking and commenting on their photos, you’d think they’d stop and be like, “Hey, who is that? I must know them, right?”

Well, being the five year old that I am, I unfollowed all of these people. It was satisfying to say the least. Here I was, kind of caring about their lives and the feeling wasn’t mutual. BYE FELICIA.

You know, I always felt a strong connection with Josie Gellar in Never Been Kissed for this exact reason.

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3. Combining Couples Names

Tiddleswift? Really? I feel like this should have died years ago. When did this start? 2009? 2010? It’s been going on for way too long.

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4. Spilling your guts on Instagram and Twitter

I’m talking about the quotes that say, “I don’t remember what it’s like to not feel broken.” Leave that shit on Facebook if you feel compelled to tell everyone you’re depressed about something. Isn’t that what Facebook has become? Everyone’s therapy? Don’t bring Twitter and Instagram into that mess. Those are places for happy and funny thoughts, along with a massive amount of puppy pictures.

5. Instachat?

STORY TIME.

I had a Snapchat once. I deleted it after a day because I thought it was stupid.

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What are some of your 2016 Pet Peeves? Please share your annoyances with me.

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Art, Connecticut, Festivities, Humor, I Wasn't Worried, I'm not a mommy blogger, Internet Things, My Idea Of Being An Adult, Social Media

Art Project: Florals, Fruit, For Sale, Oh My!

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Hello beautiful people! I’ve finally done it! I’ve created the website that holds all of my hopes and dreams.

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote a blog post about the latest watercolors I’ve created over the last few months. It’s been a wonderful lifestyle so far, and whenever I feel the urge to paint something, I’m able to hop over to my desk and do just that. I had been toying with the idea of trying sell my artwork, but obviously it won’t be an easy task. The very idea of it terrifies me to no end, but it’s worth a shot and it gives me a chance to continue painting, whether it works out or not. I don’t expect to become the next Andy Warhol. I know my reality.

I’ve decided to name my new art site Reyna Art & DesignFor a couple of years, my dad sold his artwork. He mostly drew portraits when requested, but he loved to draw celebrity portraits like Marilyn Monroe and John Wayne. He had a Facebook page called Reyna Art, so I decided to continue the tradition.

My biggest problem is that I’m not a big promoter. I feel like those annoying salespeople that show up on your doorstep, trying to convince you that their plastic wrap is better than Glad. I don’t want to be that annoying person. I don’t want to be that person who posts an image of my artwork on Instagram or Twitter every two hours, trying to get people to buy things. Which means, I’ll need all the help I can get from you lovely people. NO PRESSURE. All I ask is that if you happen to know other artists, such as friends or family, pass me along via Instagram or Twitter, or share my website. If you happen to buy a painting of mine, post it to social media with a wink. Sharing is caring.

So far, I have seven pieces up for grabs. Since my last art post, I’ve done some diddling with florals again.

I've called this "Lumineer's Flowers" for reasons I'm sure you've read about.

I’ve called this “Lumineer’s Flowers” for reasons I’m sure you’ve read about.

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I’ve been playing around with different colored pineapples because I think they’re adorable.

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I’ve recently tried out the local paint bar in South Norwalk, CT called Muse Paintbar.

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He’s pretending to be proud of his bottle. I thought it came out fabulous!

So please, peruse my new website and pass it along! You can even find the website under my “Shop” page 🙂

ALSO, I’m going to do a shout out to someone I went to high school with back in the day. Miss Emma Marty sells wonderfully unique jewelry and has recently appeared in Vogue. Check out her page here!

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Anecdote, Humor, Internet Things

Answers to My Lies

I had three amazing participants in my 2 Truths and a Lie post and it was a close call for all of you.

I was a little shocked by your responses, so I’ll backlash a little bit. All of the false statements are in bold.

One

a) My first ever autograph from a celebrity was Shia LaBeouf’s.

b) I love jalapenos.

c) I’ve never been on a roller coaster before.

*I’ve been using the “never been on a roller coaster” line for YEARS because it always works. Only one of you guessed that option. Shia LaBeouf was in fact my first ever celebrity autograph. My mom had a friend who was the hair dresser on Even Stevens in Hollywood. Of course, I was like eight at the time and didn’t appreciate it and it was way before he got disgustingly famous and I lost it….

The fact that I hate jalapenos just proves that I’m the worst. Mexican. Ever.

Winner: Ben!

Two

a) I was voted “Most Gullible” in my eight grade class superlatives.

b) My first job out of college was for a trash and recycling company.

c) I actually really enjoyed Kim Kardashian’s autobiography KIM.

*I’m a little appalled by Paul that he could possibly think that I enjoyed Kim Kardashian’s biography. Luckily, all three of you got the lie correct. I hated her autobiography. I stood in Barnes and Noble and did a monologue reading with my friends, while also laughing hysterically.

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a) I casually saw Kate Flannery (aka, Meredith from The Office) in Seal Beach, California one Sunday afternoon.

b) I played a mime in my sixth grade school musical.

c) I went horseback riding in Texas once, and the horse stepped on my foot.

*YA GOT ME. All three of you picked C.

Four

a) I accidentally killed the class gold fish in elementary school.

b) In sixth grade, I beat up a boy on the playground.

c) I’m terrified of clowns.

*Apparently most of you think I’m not capable of beating up a boy. Hardy-har-har. Granted, I did have some help from a few other girls but basically, it was four girls against one boy. In my defense, he was being a buttface.

Winner: 0

xcFive

a) When I was two, my first dance recital ballet song was to Beauty and the Beast‘s “Be Our Guest”.

b) I have five birth marks.

c) I used to play Pocahontas with my grandpa, and I made him play John Smith.

*Most of you are correct. I have four birth marks.

Winner: Ben and Paul!

1st place: Bitter Ben (And you said you were bad at this) 4/5 correct

2nd place: Paul………………………………………………………….. 3/5 correct

3rd place: Joan 2/5 correct

Well Paul, you’ve won this personal battle. You got at least three answers correct while I got none. Til’ next time…because there will be a next time.

Paul – 1 Jess – 0

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